Wednesday, May 7, 2014

Some of The Good


I have talked a lot about the bad bits in my childhood, but not much about the good. There was some good aspects. 

Moving to Arkansas meant living on a dirt road that was primarily occupied by my dad's family. My grandparents made sure that each of my dad's siblings owned a piece of land along this dirt road. They also raised their children to work hard for what they have. My dad also did his best to teach my brothers and I the same work ethic. His favorite saying was " if you don't work you don't eat" . That work ethic is something that has stuck with me. For about 7 years after going on deployment I fought the national guard and civilian doctors to let me stay in the military. In the end the military forced me into a medical retirement based on a civilian neurologist's recomendation that not only should I not be in the military but he couldn't, on the best of days recomend that I so much as walk across the room. They even told me to prepare to be in a wheel chair within five years. 

 I ask for a second opinion and the military did allow me to see a few of their doctors but in the end not one of them were willing to say the neuroloigist was wrong. I thought I would miss the military but I honestly don't. I do however refuse to accept that I should just buy a wheel chair and sit on my rear and let life pass me by. So I made a decision to folow my dad's example and slow down when they put me in the ground.

I shreaded the forms that the neurologist urged me to use to appy for disability and I  kept raising my chdren and working with very little medical intervention.  I have learned to live with the pain, I have ignored it and I have pushed through it and rarely mention it. If I ever I say I need my medicatio. Then you know I am at the end of the rope.  But I live my life free of being hooked on prescription pain meds and most days I am able to be there with a clear mind when my children need me.
I am grateful daily for the lessons my dad taught me about not slowi g down.

Another thing that living on that dirt road brought to my life was gardening. My dad claimed to be too busy so my grand parents tilled and planted a half acer garden that I was largely left to tend. To this day I still have a garden!