Tuesday, September 23, 2014

I'm Just Tired


Lack of sleep has fuled our relationship from the start. At first time zones were to blame, later it was a baby that to this day requires very little sleep. In reality though throughout the entire sleepless 9 years a huge part of the missing sleep was down to sneaking onto chat sites during the night and guilt that kept him awake.

I have felt the affect is had on him, in the way he talks, looks and acts. I have ask many times what the issue is. More often than not his response has been " I am just tired". I have rarely believed him, always said it felt like more than lack of sleep and rarely argued my gut against his claims of being tired. It wasn't worth the argument that would come if I pressed for some better answer.

Lately that mask has once again surounded him and even after all that we have been dealing with and the knowledge that I know the details and the truth, the only response I have gotten is thst he is tired. 

I don't believe it for a minute, but how do I force him to be responsible for his own actions and still coddle the truth out of him. It is an impossible situation so long as he chooses to keep what ever it is a secret.